This short prose is dedicated to

The monks of St. Meinrad Archabbey

Reflections from the Mission

On a Sunday Morning


Man lives by symbols.  He cannot realize a concept, an idea, until he has bridged the abstract with the analogous world.  Only then does thought declare itself. Only then does thought become real and lasting. 

For a man's most inner striving is to seek and to search; and in this quest he is as the motherless child who wills to hope for that which he cannot see, cannot hear, and cannot touch. 

As with this child, man feels the loss, the separation.  His life becomes one of searching.  He sees a sign post just ahead… "If only this…" the sign post reads.  Thus sets he a goal, "If only this…" 

Along the way the goal is reached.  But the frustration remains, the loss is still felt. 

In endless circles does man travel, day after day, night after night, wishing and hoping all the while that if only this would be, or that would be, then all would be right again.

Man's chronic frustration with life, his inability to be satisfied with – that he lives! That he exists! stems from this sense of separation which he feels. 

He feels alone in this world, a stranger on the earth; and in his attempt to alleviate this feeling of loneliness he searches for his cause. 

To be sure, man does seek meaning and purpose in life; man is in a search for meaning.  But this search for meaning is a by-product of an effort to reduce the sense of loss which he is experiencing. 

As with the motherless child, when he has found her, then will his separation be gone, his search will be over, his life will be complete.

Man must believe.  Man must believe that his life is shared and interwoven with another.  For without this - he is as the motherless child, alone, seeking and searching for that which he cannot see, cannot hear, and cannot touch.

Man's search for meaning is his search for God.  That God exists he knows.  For mankind seeks to unite – to bring together the missing parts.  He seeks to make complete and whole that which is separated.  And though at times he may deny his own separation, his own loss, he is in constant motion to alleviate his loss.

This is what mankind is about: He seeks to find his Creator. That which cradled him in His arms during that first moment when life began.

Nenad (Cuic) Downing, Marion Mission,

May 20, 1984


The circumstance of my being at Marion Mission, about 40 miles west of Chattanooga, was my interest in becoming a brother, a monk, somewhat as Thomas Merton had done. I was drawn to all things Catholic. A Fr. Rudesell from the Peter and Paul Catholic Church in downtown Chattanooga (where I often attended) brought me to the Mission and introduced me to Fr. Basil Mattingly.  I often stayed at the Mission on weekends and during my vacation time from work.

An event happened one very early Sunday morning which I cannot explain. But some years ago I did explain in writing to a long time Catholic friend of over 40 years what had transpired. If he outlives me then perhaps he can explain. Later in the afternoon I wrote down the prose that I have written above.

I will say this and nothing more. There is another dimension in the universe. It is a reality but which is beyond our immediate perceptions, that which we perceive with our senses. I believe also that this other dimension logically explains the many paradoxes to be found in Quantum Mechanics.

We see from time to time evidence of something, an unexplained great unknown something. This includes such phenomena as the so called flying unknown phenomena at speeds and maneuverability that is beyond explanation by ordinary science. Tucker Carlson, also himself a phenomenom but apparently of this earth, has brought up these interesting happenings on his television show from time to time.

The unexplained great unknown something also includes a thing we call "Medical Miracles." And these miracles are invoked so often by the process of prayer that this too, prayer, is part of the equation to be solved.

Lastly I will tell you this: the Apparations of Our Lady, as the Catholics refer to the phenomena - are also real - as real as the flying UFOs that are detected by objective evidence devices such as radar and video recordings. When you study the matter to assess its validity - that is to say, the appearances from time to time in history and so many of these visitations in that history have been recorded - the preponderance of the evidence shouts loud and clear to all who have ears to hear and eyes to see - the phenomena, what ever it truly be - it is real! 

Listen to me. The Miraculous Medal of Our Lady of Graces, and the experience of Catherine Laboure, on July 18, 1830 - I ask you - did the world of that time know about PARTICLE PHYSICS?  Did Catherine Labourne's world of that time even conceive of Quantum Mechanics could it even ask the questions that are raised by Schrodinger's cat ? I could go on and on, the Double-slit experiment, and much more - the great unknown somethings that seem to defy common sense, an explanation today and certainly were not even thought about at the time of Miraculous Medial or even Fatima and so many other instances where what is seen and often what is felt and sometimes what is heard seems to defy the science of our time as clearly it did at the time of Catherine Laboure.

What does it all mean? That a Lady appears to us in the sky, a picture, a painting, there in the sky, and is seen by people; what does it mean that an unexplained moving object recorded by scientific devices is measured and observed by expert witnesses such as military pilots? 

It means in my opinion that a great unknown something is telling us - that it, the great unknown something exists! That it is real. That is to say, there is another reality - another dimension in the universe - shall we call it heaven?

This I know above all else that I have observed and felt in my life time. There exists a spiritual world, bound by its own set of laws - spiritual laws that hold it together. It appears that we can tap into this dimension with the energy of our prays, our contemplations and wonderment of it all. Some will say, "What is the proof." Swamiji Vivekananda has replied in his lectures (all of which are available on this website and others) that "it is unfair to ask for a material proof to spiritual phenomena."

You can understand that there exists different states of matter. As the cosmos are studied in depth by the astronomers - what IS often becomes what WAS.  The Steady-state theory, proposed in 1948 by Bondi, T. Gold and Sir Fred Hoyle is today WHAT WAS but in 1948 it was what IS.

<aside> By the way, here is something to give you goose bumps - but don't blame it on the goose or you may yourself get goosed by new knowledge.

Thomas Gold, a world famous astonomer from yesteryear - proposed, along with other scientists from the past - the Abiogenic petroleum origin of OIL. Black gold! Really a complement if you are a back dude.

"The abiogenic petroleum origin proposes that most of earth's petroleum and natural gas deposits were formed inorganically"  Wiki, see link above.

Now Wiki article sort of poo poos Gold's theory. By the way, his book is on Amazon.

But take a look at this:

https://www.usnews.com › opinion › blogs › on-energy › 2011 › 09 › 14 › abiotic-oil-a-theory-worth-exploring
Abiotic Oil a Theory Worth Exploring - US News & World Report
Thomas Gold, a respected astronomer and professor emeritus at Cornell University in Ithaca, NY, has held for years that oil is actually a renewable, primordial syrup continually manufactured...

https://healthresearchfunding.org › abiotic-oil-theory-explained
Abiotic Oil Theory Explained - HRF
There are 6 possible mechanisms that could support the processes described in the abiotic oil theory, creating organic matter from inorganic matter. 1. Ancient Deposits. Crude oil and natural gas could be formed from ancient hydrocarbon deposits that have always been present on our planet.

https://www.realclearscience.com › blog › 2015 › 07 › oil_deniers.html
The Prestigious Scientist Who Theorized That Oil Comes from Another ...
According to Gold's theory, abiotic oil should have been present below the crater in great quantities. It wasn't. Despite drilling down over six kilometers in two locations, the costly operation turned up just 80 barrels of oil over six years, and there was no definitive proof that it was abiotic in origin.


Well, it's getting real late so I will continue tomorrow, actually now today, for tomorrow is another day and always has been. But in closing, in view of world events now going on (2023) did you know that originally this theory of T. Gold was called The Ukranian Theory regarding the formation of oil in very deep layers of the earth. Something to think about.


- bye for now.

gute Nacht and До свидания

In 1985 work brought me to Central Kentucky. The location was about an hour drive to St. Meinrad Archabbey. Approximately three months during the length of the outage I traveled each Friday evening after work to St. Meinrad – to stay for the weekend. Come very early each morning the great bells of St. Meinrad would awaken me to make hast and attend the Liturgy of the Hours.

Then I would return to the room where I stayed and read books and  – quietly thought about things in general.

During the day I would often takes walks around the Monastery grounds, visit the large library, and again, just think.

The evening would come again and the great bells would ring their call for the Liturgy of the Hours.

Monday morning, I would arise and once again walk to the Cathedral for the morning service. Then I would travel back to my work station in Kentucky. This went on for about three months.



(rev 2023-Feb-07, added bio material but nothing else)